What’s scarier than a haunted house?

Welcome to October Newsletter!

October has arrived, and everywhere we look, the season leans into the spooky and supernatural: plastic spiders, ghost stories, haunted houses, and skeletons on front porches.

It’s fun and festive—but when you strip away the seasonal folklore, what truly frightens most of us runs much deeper.

What can be far scarier than any Halloween monster are the unachieved dreams, the missed opportunities, and the paths we talk ourselves out of ever exploring.

We often hear that our greatest dreams sit directly on the other side of discomfort and resistance. That leaves us with an inevitable choice:

• We can leap into the discomfort, enduring the short-term panic of being a beginner.

• Or we can stay safely where we are, carrying the long-term dread of never knowing what could have been.

Both paths are scary. One is intense at the beginning; the other is painful at the end. The choice is yours.

The Shift from "I Can’t" to "It’s Doable"

Years ago, during my graduate program, I taught college public speaking—consistently cited as one of the top fears people hold.

On the first day of class, the room was almost always filled with tense postures and guarded expressions. The dominant belief among most students was binary and rigid: "Some people are natural public speakers, and I am not one of them."

In that very first session, we didn't jump into high-stakes presentations. We talked openly about the nature of fear and the anatomy of a skill.

Throughout the semester, we took the intimidating, towering monster of "public speaking" and dismantled it into bite-sized, practicable steps: breath control, vocal pacing, simple story structure, and low-stakes repetitions. After just a few rounds of practice in a supportive room, a quiet transformation took place. By the end of the term, the narrative shifted from "I could never do this" to "I can do this. It’s doable."

Re-examining the Missing Piece

In my work as a coach, I see this dynamic play out time and time again.

When we feel hesitant to launch an initiative, voice our needs, set a boundary, or step into a new chapter, our instinct is to label it as a personal flaw: "I’m not brave enough," or "I just don't have the confidence."

In reality, most hesitation isn't a lack of courage. It is simply a lack of a specific skill, a clear framework, or enough low-stakes practice.

Confidence isn't something you wait to feel before you begin—it is the natural byproduct of repeated competence. When fear shows up, it isn't an instruction to turn back; it’s an invitation to identify what you haven't learned yet.

A Reflection for This October

As the days turn cooler and the season invites us to reflect, ask yourself:

1. What is one thing you’ve been avoiding or hesitating to start because it feels uncomfortable?

2. If you strip away the fear, what specific skill is missing or unpracticed?

3. What is one low-stakes way you could practice that skill this week?

Feeling stuck on where to begin?

If facing your hesitation feels like too big of a leap right now, remember that having a partner makes all the difference. As a coach, my role is to help you build the exact skills and low-stakes practice you need to move forward with confidence.

If you’re ready to dismantle a fear that has been keeping you small, reach out—let’s turn that hesitation into your next breakthrough. Book A Discovery Call.

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